The First Taste
by Kapperz1212
Summary: I forcedly contained the monster and, as gently as possible, lifted her hand to my mouth...“Edward, we have some bad news…”...You’re the type of monster she had nightmares of when she was little....Dive in. Grab me. Help me. Save me...R&R please!
1. Chapter 1: The Decision

_Author's Note- This is what happened as the Cullens (or some of them at least) made their way from the Phoenix airport to the dance studio and beyond! It's all from Edward's POV_

_I hope you enjoy it! whether you do or not leave a comment and let me know!_

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**EPOV.**

Heat rose to my eyes and stung around the edges, and if I were human the tears would have been uncontrollable. Two very different emotions swarmed within my cold chest. The rage I felt towards James was literally painful, had I no other more significant task, his soul would already have been extinguished. The other was a mix of fear, pain, love, and loyalty for Bella. The warmth of the two intense emotions was scorching my abdomen.

"Edward, turn here!" Alice demanded.

The left swerve into the small suburban development wrenched the focus from my emotions. Alice's vision and Bella's description of her old neighborhood had gotten us this far; it was up to me now. I was furious with myself. If only we had gotten an earlier flight. I should have anticipated that James was coming to find her here…this was my fault.

Bella's endangerment was always my fault. I placed her in constant peril. She deserved so much more.

Carlisle's Mercedes whirred quickly through the grid like labyrinth of Bella's childhood neighborhood. Just the thought of her name struck a note of indescribable panic. It was sad that I could not enjoy the place that Bella's young laughter once filled, I should have been able to relish in Bella's past, soak in as much as possible. Instead I was racing against time to save her from death.

Bella. Death. My chin sunk into my chest as my shoulders heaved and a sob choked through my throat.

Jasper's hands were suddenly at my shoulders. The effect cleared my eyes enough to glimpse the road but didn't reach the feelings of horror and despair.

I searched the serge of voices for James' slithery speech. I sifted through nonsensical and pathetic human thoughts outraged that his had not surfaced as quickly as necessary.

_Ha! Look at her knees quiver…this is just so utterly melodramatic. My video may turn out better than I even imagined._

The image of Bella's terror-stricken face filled his mind and the fear leapt into my heart that used to beat. The stab of pain nearly crumpled my stone chest; my foot fell harder onto the accelerator.

_What else could I possibly do to provoke that beastly boy?_

_Her skin looks excruciatingly delicious with her blood pulsing so._

The fury that swam through me threatened to incapacitate my mind. That blood was hers and I was not going to allow **anyone,** not even myself to deny her of it.

The rows of redundant middle-class income housing began to bleed together. We were coming closer, his thoughts were louder… and thirstier. My desperation was overwhelming; my foot pushed the speedometer well over 120 miles per hour.

_Where to start? Hmm… difficult choices…drama or precision…. presentation or thirst…._

"NO!" I screamed. The exclamation made Carlisle in the seat next to me jump.

"Edward you have to calm down if you lose control now we will not arrive until it's too late."

I saw Bella's deep eyes frozen in a state of horror and her skin devoid of the blush I yearned for. I wrestled the thought from my mind.

I drew my favorite memories of Bella to the front of my mind: the blush under her skin when she was angry, the quickening of her heartbeat when I touched her. My heart warmed simply at the thought of her beauty. I remember the first time she whispered my name while she dreamt. A sweet smile crept across my lips as I imagined the sound of her voice as she spoke my name, as said she loved me. My breath caught in my chest.

Abruptly the memories withdrew to their sacred stony chamber at the back of my head.

_Wow, she attempted to run. I was beginning to wonder if she had any typical human sense of self-preservation at all._

She was mine to preserve! My stone fingers began to quiver as I resisted crushing the steering wheel beneath my tendons. That filthy beast would regret his thoughts…

Her brilliantly chocolate eyes appeared beneath the lids of mine. She looked up at me through her thick lashes.

Bella will not die. She cannot die. I love her. I cannot live without her. I will die.

_Her skin is much warmer than I anticipated._

I saw the images of the mirrors crashing down, after he threw her across the room, the jagged glass flew in all directions. My keen ears searched the surrounding air for the direction in which to travel. I threw the car around a sharp, right corner ignoring the stop sign.

_Hot…crimson…thick…_

He was thirsty.

I was fuming. I refused to listen to the words of his thoughts and concentrated on the direction they were coming from.

Bella danced through my mind. Her scent, her warmth, her voice, her sweet laughter, the way she shook her hair down her back…

_Now._

My heart plummeted. It instantly sunk between the spaces of my abdomen and leaked into the hollow between my pelvic bones. NO! NO! More time!

A slight yelp of helplessness escaped from my lungs. NO! This can't be happening! Not my Bella…my angel…my love… the star that slipped from heaven into the arms of the earth…

If there were any God he would grant me with the speed to save the one I loved. The one of whom my life consisted. His hands need be around my Bella. I prayed.

I didn't wait for the car to stop when I flew onto the asphalt of the parking lot. The small building's shades were drawn and the street was deserted.

I froze and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. The scent was indescribable. Carlisle's thoughts ran through my mind.

_There must be a large amount of blood for the smell to be that strong._

My nostrils flared, my muscles tensed as the back of my throat widened, and a heavy flow of venom spilled onto my tongue. Carlisle again.

_Edward, are you sure you'll be able to resist?_

I was through the door before his thought was finished. Emmett and Jasper snarled. Their brilliant teeth gleamed as they shoved past my left shoulder, dragging James through the open door. Jasper's eyes were blackened with intense thirst; the human blood was in dangerous proximity. Emmett's were alight with fury. His thoughts left me satisfied with the knowledge that James would suffer before his death. I may have jumped in and torn his throat out had I not seen what was lying in front of me.

Bella lie in a gentle mangled heap across the room from me. The floor beneath her was soaked.

A hideous cry of pain tore through my chest. My ribs stung as the panic swelled against my bones. I stopped breathing the intoxicating air, saturated with the scent of my dear Bella's blood.

I beat Carlisle to her side. The vivid color of her blood contrasted with the sandy wood flooring of the dance room. My skin seared where the pool of blood seeped through my pants.

My heart's contents slid away into the bottom of my abdomen and cemented to the inner walls of my stomach. I whimpered in pain, and then called for her in desperation. NO! Bella! All I could scream was her name.

The heat behind my eyes made them ache with pain.

I heard the screeches and violence of Emmett and Jasper's brawl. Emmett's riveting growl shook the floor. The thought of James' painful death did nothing to relieve my panic.

My angel couldn't be called back to heaven so soon.

I began to call her back to me. Please. I begged the Lord at that point, promised him every part of my soul, the service of my entire existence, just please to save Bella.

Carlisle made it clear that her wounds were severe but not necessarily fatal.

They couldn't be fatal…she must survive. It was necessary that he stop the bleeding. _Blood._ Not just any blood. It was Bella's blood.

I felt the heat from the liquid beneath me rising into my skin…into my nostrils…. into my mouth.

I cried. It was different from a human cry obviously because of the lack of tears. But the sobs shook my body as they struggled to emerge from my throat. I cried out in anguish, in pain, and in love.

Suddenly Bella's normally soft voice was shrill as she began shrieking. She yelled in agony and terror. Something was burning her.

I could see nothing, no fire or smoke. The panic circulated through my body and my limbs began to shake. I searched everywhere, overlooking nothing. I could not discover the source of her blistering pain.

Carlisle tensed beside me.

_He bit her._

The fury that beheld me strained against the confines of my soul. A hideous howl escaped through my lips.

Yet there was a small portion of my mind that consented with what was occurring. If Bella were transformed she would be with me _forever._ That was an idea I very much appreciated.

Then my greater half chimed in. I would never doom Bella to the eternal twilight; she was too full of the sun. I would also never allow someone else's venom to taint her either. To never see her blush again or feel the tender skin of her arm, no, that would be unbearable. She was human. She will remain human as long as I had control of that fate.

_Edward, the only way to save her is to extract the venom. _

_You have to do it. I cannot stop stitching her wounds or she will bleed to death._

As I came to recognize Carlisle's words for what they were, an intense intrigue gripped my senses. The monster inside of me awoke and smiled in delight. _Finally a taste._

Horrified I catapulted myself as far from Bella as possible. I shoved the emergency exit door wide and sucked the sticky air into my chest. The fresh air calmed the monster and my sore heart put me back at Bella's side. She was thrusting her right hand away from body and writhing in torture.

The blood from her head wound oozed down over her eyebrows and dripped into her eyes. She kept trying to blink it away but it clung to her eyelashes. Alice held Bella's face in her hands and used her thumbs to clear away what she could.

Bella's hand was covered in blood, as if she'd been finger painting with a disturbingly grotesque color. Although her palm was facing me it was the back of her hand that had been pierced.

Her eyes were forced closed in pain. They suddenly shot open and she parted her lips. She muttered my name and something fluttered inside of me. Strength.

I forcedly contained the monster and, as gently as possible, lifted her hand to my mouth.

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_Author's note: I know the emotions seem really overwhelming but it's how i imagined Edward reacting as he saw Bella so torn up! Chapter 2 will be up soon!_


	2. Chapter 2: The Waiting Room

I whimpered softly as I held my beautiful angel as gently as vampirely possible. She was in so much pain, pain I had inadvertently caused. My frozen heart ached with remorse.

"Edward?" Bella shifted her face towards me without opening her eyes. "Edward my head hurts." She whispered, as she lay cradled between my arms and against my chest.

"I know Bella, I'm here. We're going to make everything better, I promise." I couldn't allow her too much freedom of movement because of her stitches and broken leg, which rested in a makeshift splint. I adjusted her closer into my body, as we slid into the backseat of Carlisle's Mercedes.

"We?" Her heartbeat flitted a small amount and her eyes fluttered as if they were about to open.

"Yes Bella, Carlisle's here too. We're going to a hospital. You'll be safe. I'm here." She relaxed into my arms and her heartbeat slowed.

My worry for her was sickening. But my relief was immeasurable, she was alive and she was in my arms. What more could I wish for? Her skin was paler than usual due to the deficient amount of blood in her veins, but her beauty was no less stunning. Her body temperature soared above her typical warmth.

"Carlisle, how much further? She's so hot. She needs medical attention and she needs it now." I could feel Bella's consciousness slipping. There was so much broken and harmed on her fragile body.

"Edward we're almost there. Her body is heating up because of the rush of white blood cells in her system; they're trying to heal her. But with as much blood as she's lacking I doubt they're doing much good."

My eyes fell back to Bella's soothing face, her porcelain cheeks, the dip of her chin, and the curves of her lips. I traced my fingertips over her features memorizing their perfection, her thick eyelashes, the slope of her nose, and the heat of her forehead. I lowered my face, delicately brushed my lips over her cheeks and skimmed over the thin skin of her neck.

"I love you Bella." I breathed into her ear. Bella's open wounds made it much more difficult to breathe around her. I held my breath for the car ride, appreciating the glorious love I had for her.

_Edward, we're here. _

I had been so consumed by Bella; I had not realized that the car was no longer moving. Carlisle's Mercedes was parked beneath the overhang of the ER wing at the Phoenix Memorial Hospital.

I slid from the back seat and impatiently pushed through the automatic double doors. The stark white hallway was full of rushed nurses and assistants that moved around much too loudly. Carlisle spoke urgently with the lady at the desk as a man wheeled a stretcher around the corner. I lay Bella gently onto the thin mattress but kept her hand in mine. I wasn't ready to let her go yet. Entrusting her fate to Carlisle was completely different from throwing it into the hands of strangers.

A nurse came from around the desk with a clipboard against her hip.

"We're going to need you to fill this out sir." She handed me the clipboard and a pen.

"Alright, thank you." I glanced quickly at the sheets of paper before turning back to the nurse. Her nametag read Jen. "Please, if there is anything you can do to tend to her more quickly, she is in dire need of surgery." _And I can't lose her._ I said the last part to myself. Worry hung deeply in my voice. I stared down at Bella as the male nurse began pushing her down the hallway and past the desk. I kept her hand in mine.

_Poor thing, he seems so upset. This must be his girlfriend._

Although the male's thoughts were simple enough, they made me smile. I appreciated the fact that they realized how important she was. No one would ever completely understand what Bella truly meant to me. It was indescribable.

"I'm sorry, you're going to have to wait here." The male's voice was detached but sounded sympathetic all the same. Naturally I was asked to await the news in the waiting room outside of the intensive care unit.

I stole one lasting look at her. My heart melted some. I grudgingly let go of her warm hand. I allowed my fingers to softly brush against her cheek. _I love you Isabella Swan. _

With that the nurse whisked her away, into a room of sharp metal objects and people who said goodbye for a living.

Would she ever forgive me for putting her through this? I winced at the thought. Glancing around the room, it was dreary and sparse. Mostly what you would expect of an emergency wing waiting room. There was only one other person there, a small woman who was worriedly wringing her hands through a handkerchief as she paced around the cramped space.

_What was he thinking? He was too young. I should have taught him better. Oh Lord please save my boy._

A tear rolled down her cheek as she raised her head. A petite girl in scrubs had walked in from the ICU.

"Mrs. Caldwell?"

"Yes? That's me." _Oh no, please let him be all right._

"Your son BJ just got out of surgery."

"Yes. Is he okay?" her voice had begun to shake. The nurse walked towards Mrs. Caldwell and led her through the steel swinging doors.

"He's going to live, but it may be…." The nurse's voice trailed off and I opted out of eavesdropping.

I had enough burdens of my own. I didn't need to forcibly listen to those of others.

I sat down into one of the monochrome colored chairs against the back of the room. The cushions were stiff. The rectangular and plastic gray table in front of me was layered in wrinkled magazines and over read comic sections. A small television flickered in the corner to my right.

I leaned my head back against the wall behind the chair and let my eyes shut. My brow creased together as I allowed the stony chamber of my memories to pour Bella into my mind. I thought back to when I had seen her in Port Angeles preparing to ward off the four lewd stalkers that had herded her into a back alley. She looked steady and brave.

I wondered if that's how she had appeared as James encircled her and planned her murder. A low growl brewed within me at the thought of what he had done to Bella. My chest grew alight with fury and disgust. I raised my hand and put pressure against the bridge of my nose.

I had put Bella in such danger, caused her so much pain. A bitter ache befell my frigid chest. Bella was the last person in the world I wanted to cause harm to. Carlisle's entrance interrupted my pensiveness. His thoughts were too familiar to ignore.

_I explained everything they seemed to understand._

He placed himself in the chair next to me. Alice had already fabricated a rather convincing tale on what had put Bella in such a condition. After tripping on her way down a staircase she ended up two flights of stairs below and through a window. I had to smile for it was possible…for Bella at least.

Alice had left immediately and begun creating the scene back at the hotel. I had to admit, she had done an excellent job. Our century of necessary crime had made us experts at staging and executing crime scenes. My thoughts fell back to Bella, lying in the Emergency room with LCD monitors beeping around her. My mouth sunk into a frown.

_She's going to be all right Edward_.

Carlisle's thoughts were comforting but not so much as to calm my worry. My head slipped into my hands, my forehead rested on the edges of my wrists and my elbows balanced on my knees. My body shook subtly in fear of an unimaginable loss. My foot kept tapping, I was anxious for a nurse to arrive and let me know exactly how extensive the damage was.

_Edward, Emmett and I are in the parking lot; we'll be there soon._

Alice had arrived. I relaxed minimally knowing she would be here soon. Alice was always a positive presence. Even when Jasper wasn't around, or when he wasn't able to be. The hospital full of wounded humans bleeding fresh blood, well that just wasn't a comfortable place for Jasper to be.

In times of great emotion music always filled my mind. This time, my lungs inflated and deflated to the beat of Death Cab for Cutie, a popular alternative band that I thoroughly enjoyed. Their latest CD, Plans, had many songs that related to my current position. But one in particular came to me, 'What Sarah Said'. I hummed the acoustics quietly to myself as the lyrics sung in my head.

'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room  
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news  
And then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads  
But I'm thinking of what Sarah said that "Love is watching someone die"

There was no comfort to this room. But I was not going to watch someone die. Not this someone, not my everything. My shoulders slumped forward and a large ball formed at the back of my throat. I shoved my eyes into the palms of my hands. A weak cry of pain came from me; Carlisle's solid arm fell upon my shoulders. He embraced me slightly before releasing.

_We're here for you Edward. That's what families are for. I have faith that Bella will recover_.

"Yeah well we're about to find out," I uttered, "here comes the nurse."


	3. Chapter 3: Something to tell

_Author's note- Hardest chapter to write so far! Let me know what you think... : )_

_Disclaimer- I don't own any parts of Twilight or New Moon_

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Four broken ribs, a shattered leg, cracks in her skull, and severe blood loss, it could've been worse.

She would be in a medical induced coma for six or more days, it would make it easier for her body to heal itself. She needed some blood transfusions and surgery to reconstruct the bones below her knee, a couple of screws and a steel rod for reinforcement.

I didn't like the idea of Bella in a hospital bed. I had even more distaste for the fact that I couldn't be with her. I was forced to sit outside the ICU in the uncomfortable chairs and choke in the sterile air of the hallways. It was fiercely irritating.

I yearned for Bella's scent, for her face, her breath, her touch….

Emmett snickered from across the room; his simple yet content mind had been entertained for a couple of hours by the flickering colors parading across the television screen. He was always a positive presence, even in the bleakest of circumstances

Alice sat on my left, her small knees tucked into her chest, her thin arms wrapped around them. Her head faced me although her eyes were closed and her lips pursed. She was focusing; a vision of Bella swam through her mind. I observed Alice's train of thought intently before releasing a sigh of relief.

Bella would be all right and I would be able to see her soon. That calmed my nerves some. There was still a tedious wait ahead of me. Even one day could seem like an eternity without her.

Alice rummaged through the small bag at her feet and produced an unmarked envelope.

"She told me to give this to her mother, but it's for you." She grimaced.

"How do you know…" I stopped mid sentence...what a stupid remark. Alice always knows. She flashed a smile through her amused expression.

My heart swelled with agony as I read her letter. She loved me…. James had captured Renee…she was running away…. don't blame Alice or Jasper…don't come after her…

I began to feel the fury boil over inside of me. Not go after her? Did she ever think that I wouldn't go after her? Did she have any comprehension at all of the love I had for her? Of how much I needed her?

I refolded the paper after that. The weak paper crumpled pathetically in my stony grip. I couldn't take anymore…. she was safe now. I forced the tips of my fingers against my temples and shoved the thought of what could have happened had I _not_ come after her out of my mind.

I focused on the present. _The present is the point at which time touches eternity. _C.S. Lewis had written that into one of his many manuscripts. I liked the idea that the quote supposed. _Eternity. _I had that.

_An eternity with Bella. _That's what I wished for. But it would never be…

Who would choose a life of carnivorous cravings and damnation, over warmth and a soul?

I had been wrestling with the idea of changing Bella for months. I remained convinced that Bella's soul would not be condemned to the obscurity of the night.

_Nothing would make Bella happier. It's what she wants._

Alice's thoughts hummed through my conscious. Alice somehow always knew what I was thinking. Or mostly assumed what was passing through my mind, predicting the intricate patterns my thoughts seemed to follow.

"No, I could never." It pained me to think of it. My eyes searched for something mildly distracting on the bare walls. I could never allow Bella's soul to be stolen because of me.

The hours passed slowly, dusk came soon enough and Carlisle and Emmett left for the dance studio. The scene of the actual crime had to be torched before anyone could get suspicious of the pools of blood and shattered mirrors, floors, and windows. Vampires were easily some of the most destructive beings ever.

The next couple of days passed foggily, Alice and I left periodically once to hunt, other times just to change clothes or shower. I didn't enjoy leaving Bella at the hospital alone, so Emmett or Carlisle would always be in the waiting room when it was necessary that I leave. I would rush back only to find everything exactly how I had left it.

This waiting was really testing my nerves; it was impossible to find anything even close to entertaining in that small room.

Mostly I quietly allowed my thoughts to slink around the cavern behind my eyes; they were intoxicatingly full of Bella. At times I would breathe in and swear that she was lying in my lap, for my memories would so convincingly enrapture me with her scent.

The third day's insipid passing brought some fantastic news around the human lunch hour. Bella was able to have visitors now. She wouldn't be able to respond to anything we said or did, due to the coma, but I could see my Bella. I leapt to the assistant's side much faster than humanly possible, she didn't notice, she had been on an all night shift.

Alice had returned to the hotel much earlier in the morning to spend time with Jasper. So I was alone. We had to keep up some appearances; none of the staff had seen me "sleep" through a night for three days. So my family had to leave every so often. There were a couple of hours every once in awhile when my eyes would shut for convenience and I would think of a future with Bella, of the life I wanted to live with her, _forever_.

She was the star of my sleepless nights in that waiting room. She was the star of all my nights, the dream that I watched sleep, the beating heart of my numbed soul.

I impatiently followed the small attendant. As we arrived at Bella's room I nearly shoved one of the nurses to the ground in order to get past her.

Bella's body was covered in webs of plastic tubing, her leg was suspended above her bed in a cloth sling, and almost every inch of visible skin was covered in bruises. I sprung to her bedside. Grasping her hand, I lifted it to my lips, careful not to crush the balmy skin beneath them. The nurses had opportunely chosen to leave the room to lend us some privacy.

The wave of bliss that swept my mind clear of thought was so strong that I swayed with its current as it settled in my stomach. I was so elated to see Bella that the torturous days in that dreary room were worthwhile. I had been so excited that I had completely forgotten to breathe. My lungs struggled to release the air I had been concealing and I inhaled the scent of my love.

_Uck._ Something was wrong with the atmosphere that was filling my sinuses. The diagnostic report of the first night played through my head; the nurse had said that she had needed multiple blood transfusions. Well that explains things.

However the bliss was so arresting that this flawed moment was incapable of ruining the sensation. But I could not wait for it to return…. the titillating scent of Bella that seemed to entice so many of my senses, even the human ones that I had long believed I'd lost.

But for now, her presence was all I desired. I pulled a folding chair to the edge of her bed. I could feel the heat of her body from beneath the sheets as I folded my arms down on the bedding and rested my chin on the peak of my crossed forearms.

Her chest rose and fell delicately. I reveled in the sound of her heartbeat, I breathed in time with her subdued breaths.

Slowly, carefully, hesitantly I reached up towards her angelic face. I let my hand hover a few centimeters above her parted mouth. Her hot breath made my skin tingle; I lowered my hand to her collarbone, tracing the outline across her shoulders.

I found such solace in the rudely sparse hospital room resting my head next to Bella, time didn't even seem important enough to consider. At times her feathery lashes would quiver and her lips would shift, I could only assume that she was dreaming.

"If only I knew what was going through your mind…" I declared softly. I desperately wished that I could hear what lingered in her thoughts. However I was becoming accustomed to the fact that I was not able to hear her, there had to be a reason. Everything had reason.

I was entirely immersed in Bella; I didn't hear their thoughts or realize their presence until Alice rested her bleachy hand upon my shoulder. Carlisle and Emmett sauntered into the room, with a nurse in tail.

The nurse slid between the men and produced a syringe from her tray. She began to angle it towards Bella and I tensed instinctively.

_Edward relax, it's just some pain medication to help her sleep more comfortably. _

Alice's thoughts annoyed me. I had two doctorates from Princeton and Johns Hopkins University in Medicine. _Of course_ I knew that the nurse was injecting Bella with pain medication. That didn't make me any less sensitive to anyone affronting Bella with sharp objects; I shrugged my sister's petite hand from my shoulder and turned my head away from the IV.

The nurse left as soon as the medicine had been administered. Carlisle swiveled around to face me with a concerned and serious expression bent across his features. His mouth twitched slightly as he struggled to dispel what rolled in between his vocal chords. I avoided the sounds of his thoughts, nervous of what needed to be said. I wasn't quite sure that I wanted to hear it.

"Edward, we have some bad news…"


	4. Chapter 4: News

_Author''s note- I know this is short but i just had to post it!_

_R&R_

_Disclaimer- i own nothing of twilight or new moon_

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My flesh began to crawl as I thought of the news that was about to fill my ears . What if it had to do with Bella? What if it was another brutal vision that Alice had seen? How could she have hidden it from me? Had I not been focusing close enough? What if she had seen Bella dying and I hadn't been able to help? What if Alice had seen Bella retracting an incurable infection? or bleeding to death? Humans were so fragile. She could be taken from me so easily.

My stomach was doing somersaults in distress…I began to feel nauseous…I couldn't even begin to remember the last time I had felt this way.

If Bella were like me, I wouldn't have to worry about her medical conditions. She'd be close to indestructible. Ah! No…I couldn't…_I can't_. My heart ached out of regret? love? denial? I couldn't identify the emotion.

Should I have let James' venom run its course through her veins? Would she be suffering as much had I allowed the Devil to extinguish the flame that heated her blood?

My thoughts began to knot themselves around each other. My emotions were too daunting to allow my conscious to untie them….

The moment after Carlisle's words were first flung into the room seemed to stretch on forever, however the moment could not last long enough. The dread that surged through my body was nearly incapacitating. I couldn't bear to hear what Carlisle would speak next, but I was unable to pull myself from Bella's side. An unearthly gravity held me to my chair.

I squeezed my eyes tight and braced myself for his next words….

"Victoria is here, or will be soon." _Alice's vision was not quite as telling as we might have hoped, but she may be here in as soon as a couple of hours._ He could only say so much in the proximity of human ears. He was remaining as calm as possible for the sake of my sanity, and the fact that we were in a public place, a demonstration of my true vexation would have attracted too much attention. He paused as his mouth pinched together, forming his next sentence. "She slipped away from Esme and Rose before coming to Phoenix…. I'm not quite sure how she knew to come here, James must have told her where he was heading, and since he hadn't returned after some time I think she got nervous and came to find him for herself."

"Fucking bitch." I spat out. Of the several profanities that clogged my throat this was the only one that escaped my lips.

A stab of fury flew through my spine. My mind began to race and the flurry of murderous images and emotions nearly knocked me out of the chair. I gripped the edge of the bed, molding the metal bar beneath the mattress to the shape of my clenched knuckles. She could be outside this very moment. My eyes darted towards the window and a deep growl crawled up from the bottom of my throat.

_Edward, please you have to calm down. We have to think of a plan to get Bella away from Phoenix as soon as possible. _

Alice's typically calm thoughts were plastered with anxiety. I turned my head slowly and questioned her severe uneasiness with my facial expression. Her eyes were saturated with worry…not only for Bella…there was something else.

_I haven't told Emmett or Carlisle about the other part of my vision._

I watched as the second half of Alice's vision drifted across her cerebrum.

_That's why I left this morning; I avoided thinking of it so that you wouldn't panic…. I had to go talk with Jazz and figure out the best way to handle this…._

Alice lowered her gaze to the repetive patterns along the tile floor. This vision couldn't be avoided. This had already occurred…

I was so divinely attached to my family….I would not accept any act of violence against them…not even if it was against my (at times) least favorite family member.

The enmity that flew towards me nearly crushed my ribcage; the sudden collapse threw a cough of air out through my lips. It was a stretched amount of seconds before I was able to breathe once again.

Emmett and Carlisle were deeply disturbed by my display of horror, they stared at me inquisitively, perplexed, and worried.

_Edward?_

It was Emmett's thought that broke through the surface of my mind.

_Edward what's wrong? What happened?_

Carlisle's gaze flew between Alice and I trying to decipher what had just occured.


	5. Chapter 5:The Escape

_Author's note- This was exciting to write! i hope its just as entertaining to read!! _

_let me know ur thoughts :)_

_Disclaimer- I own only the telling of this story_

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The only aspect of the room I focused on was a modest return of Bella's scent. Her body was beginning to reincorporate its own blood back into her veins. I inhaled deeply and shifted my eyes towards her peaceful expression.

"We have to get Bella out of here." My voice was steady but there was an undertow of dread that spiraled through my torso. The escape plan was a welcomed diversion from the newly found hurtle I was going to be forced to cross or rather…crush.

With yet another worry plaguing my mind, my eyes wandered towards Emmett's face, his thoughts escaped to Rosalie.

_God I miss her._

I didn't even want to imagine how Emmett would react once we told him…

"Tonight, we'll be able to take her away from here. I think the most inconspicuous way may be to sneak her out by the window. I have enough medical supplies to keep her stable and ensure that her body continues to heal." Carlisle's clear voice clashed rudely with the mechanical beeping of the monitors. I didn't enjoy the persistent beeps of those machines…it was as if they were counting down her departure.

_Departure._ I shuddered at the thought of my life without Bella. Or rather my lack of life…there would be no reason for me to exist if Bella ever died. I refused to wander blindly through a dim world of ice without the warmth and light that radiated from my angel.

I felt my mouth drop open in disbelief as I refocused my attention to the conversation in front of me. Was Carlisle being serious? Just kidnap her from the ER?

"So we are simply going to steal away with her into the night? Leave no trail and pray that they don't contact authorities? Or her parents?!" I declared. The utter illogicality of the idea hung thickly in my words.

"Edward, we aren't senseless, honestly give us some credit." Alice went to stand on the opposite side of Bella. She began to straighten the sheets at the head of the hospital bed and arranged a few stray hairs that had floated onto Bella's face behind her ears. "The two nurses that have been tending to her are at the end of four days of 19 hour shifts. They will be let off at 11:45 tonight and not expected to return for four full days. When they come back they will expect her to have been checked out already, so they won't notice. All the information that you left on the documentation the first night gets fed into a computer and then the papers are disposed of. Jasper can hack the system and delete all of her information. If a new nurse comes to check this room they will simply assume that she was checked out."

I pushed myself out of the chair and walked towards the window. No screens, the entire emergency wing was on the first floor so there was no need to worry about heights …it may work out after all. The most important thing was Bella's safety. "Well that's fine then. Let's just get away from here as soon as possible. I don't enjoy waiting for lethal predators to come crashing down upon us."

"11:45 it is then." With that they silently slipped from the room to prepare. I was left with Bella to myself, just the way I liked it.

I raised the blinds seeing as the sunset was about over. My arms folded across the windowsill. Clouded with worry, my head slumped forward and rested on the glass.

I stared into the recent twilight, the heat from the day clung desperately to the ground as its creator retreated beyond the horizon. The moon hung from the rack of stars and admired the shadowed world beneath it.

I stayed at Bella's side for the three hours between the plan's beginning, and its execution. My head throbbed ceaselessly; my six senses had been on constant alert for a painful amount of time. I strained to hear every sound, to identify every scent, and focus on every thought that proliferated mine.

My eyes however, gazed solely at the ambrosial figure in front of me. I placed her hand tenderly to my face, the flushed skin of hers against the chilly surface of mine. I wondered what it would feel like if the delicate hand beneath mine were as cold and impenetrable as my own. I allowed the thought of Bella as a vampire seep through my consciousness…what would it be like to be with her forever? To be with her in ways that we couldn't be while she was human? To spend an eternity reveling in the brilliant hold Bella had over my soul.

After all, life is just a chance to grow a soul. _I had no life without Bella, only darkness_.

But was I willing to deny _her_ of the life she was meant to live? Was I meant to be with her at all? Was that why I couldn't hear her thoughts? Was she the one being the God never intended me to interfere with?

But it's what she wants. It's what she dreams of…becoming the things of nightmares.

I was too attached. I was too deep in love. I could never survive knowing that Bella did not exist; I could not sustain knowing that she would not be by my side. I was a prisoner to the one person I would surrender my soul to.

A raging battle gushed through me, a war of head versus heart.

"I love you Bella." My heart lifted as the words trickled out past my tongue. "I will do anything and everything to keep you safe, to keep you well, to keep you happy." Although the long days within the hospital walls could have affected my eyesight it looked as though the edges of her lips lifted into a slight smile.

I leaned close to her captivating face as she expelled a sultry breath; the exquisite scent furnished my mind. My thoughts disappeared as the sweet air spread across my face. I gently laid my ear to the left side of her chest. The subdued beats of her heart hummed a rhythm that mine sang to.

The heat began to rise from her skin into mine and I couldn't help but push my lips into full contact with her flesh, the perfume of which sunk into my lungs and consumed the entirety of my chest. My lips briefly touched the base of her throat before I was called back to reality.

_Edward, it's time._

Carlisle's black car blended nicely into the crepuscular atmosphere of the night. After Carlisle fluidly detached Bella from her needles and plastic veins, he rearranged the machines so that the room appeared vacant. Emmett stood unobserved outside of the window. Alice resided behind the wheel of the vehicle, tapping her fingers impatiently on the vinyl. Jasper had rented a car and was going to meet us at one of the exits on the interstate.

The operation was committed seamlessly and Bella didn't seem to wake or stir in the least.

"Where to?" My voice was softer than a whisper. I didn't want to disturb her. The vehicle flew through the silent night.

"We travel as fast as possible towards Washington. If we have to confront Victoria, I want to do it with the strength of our entire family." Carlisle spoke softly as well.

Alice's thoughts, filled with panic and apprehension, swarmed my head; flashes of Rosalie skittered within hers. Her small hands began to tremble against the steering wheel.

She shifted the car onto the interstate and after a few minutes we pulled off into a poorly lit parking lot. A Porsche 911 Carrera sat alone, waiting. Jasper opened the driver's door and stepped onto the asphalt.

I slid Bella into my arms and cradled her against my body. Her hair dangled over the skin of my arm and swayed lightly as I adjusted out of the car. Emmett, Carlisle, and I exited the purring Mercedes and hurried to the Porsche. Jasper ambled into the passenger seat next to Alice and they sped away.

If Victoria did spot Carlisle's vehicle she would immediately recognize it, it was safer for Bella to travel in the rental. Carlisle accompanied us to supply medical attention, and Emmett was dubbed chauffeur.

The freeway was desolate and murky, the procession traveled without the interruption of other vehicles. Their swift engines propelled them through the syrupy Arizona air.

My finger outlined the apparent veins along the supple skin of Bella's wrist. I peered at the underbelly of my forearm, and searched for the vein lines that had once been there. To my complete astonishment I could see them, faintly but they were there. They weren't the rich color that Bella's were; they were a murky ghostly gray.

Bella, Isabella, Isabella Marie Swan, Ms. Swan, _Mrs. Cullen_, my lungs buckled and my heart rippled at the thought. Mrs. Isabella Marie Cullen, a smile dawned my expression…a collection of butterflies began to flutter around in my stomach. _Mrs. Edward Cullen_. My eyes fell to Bella's ivory skin that was tainted only by the heat that stained her cheeks, and my lips fell to hers.

Abruptly the world around me seemed to reveal a secret that had been quivering beneath its secular skin…

A detestable voice rustled beneath the silky thoughts of the angel in my lap.

_Filthy bastards. I'm gonna make them wish… _

My lips curled above my teeth instantaneously as an alarmingly scarlet flame darted in front of the Mercedes' Bumper. Alice didn't even have time to swerve before Victoria had realized that Bella and I were not in the Mercedes. She leapt over the car and landed, crouching, in front of the Porsche.

"Holy shit!" Emmett blared; he yanked the steering wheel to the left. A savage growl tumbled from my mouth as the devilish figure catapulted herself towards the windshield.

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_Author's note- let me know what you think..._


	6. Chapter 6: The Pursuit

_Author's note- this took awhile so sorry! enjoy!_

_R&R_

_Disclaimer- i own only the telling of this story_

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The mere impact between Victoria and the front hood of the car shattered the windshield. Glittering splinters of gooey safety glass littered the interior seating and floors as I instinctively threw myself around Bella, my body a makeshift cage from the dangerous things around us.

I snapped my gaze towards the fiery face over the hood and as if she were able to feel my eyes, she turned her face to me. Our eyes held each other's, an intensity surging across the threshold. Emmett tried to maintain control of the car and Carlisle struggled to remain in his seat as he clawed at her. And then a thunderous crack split the earth.

A relentless ringing whined in my ears as I frantically scanned around the car searching for Victoria. She was nowhere.

"What in God's name was..." Emmett stopped mid-sentence, his attention drawn to the shoulder of the road.

"JASPER!" Alice cried from the driver's seat of the still-moving Mercedes. The passenger door hung open.

Jasper was on top of Victoria, pinning her body to the highway. Her arms and legs sliced through the air, attempting to grab hold of her captor. A terrifying roar from Jasper bit through the thick, sticky air.

"Alice!" Carlisle's booming voice was sure to be heard thanks to the shattered window of the Porsche and open door of the Mercedes. "Don't stop!" The air was waterlogged with the hostility that pulsed from our bodies.

I could hear Alice's dry tears of panic pounding through her head.

_**EDWARD!**_Carlisle's thoughts screamed to me. _Listen to me, and do exactly as I say._

"Emmett! Stop the car and help Jasper hold her off for as long as possible!" A small shiny object landed in Emmett's lap as Carlisle shoved the door open. "Keep the cell phone with you at all times! Chase her as far away from us as possible!"

Somehow between the first day when Bella awoke the murderer within me, the day that should have been the end of her, and today, Bella's fate and mine had been braided into one. The fact that she was even near me was ill fated. She was put into harm's way because of me…

But what about all the times I had interfered with fate to save her…when Tyler's van had nearly crushed her, the four stalkers in Port Angeles, James' venom.

What if destiny had stolen away from the path that fate had set for us? What if instead of being Bella's condemner, as originally intended, I was to be her savior? Her protector?

Bella and I? Destined to be together…

Was Bella then destined to be something like me…to be with me _forever_…for our paths to be intertwined until the end of eternity?

The lovely thought was interrupted by Carlisle's mental demands.

_You must keep her as steady as possible, do not let her bounce around too much, any exaggerated movement will tear open the delicate stitches that her body has put in place to hold her wounds together._

As the car skidded towards a stop I reached towards the door handle, "Kill the bitch Emmett." The car halted in the center of two lanes six hundred yards from where Jasper and Victoria were shredding the asphalt to pieces.

_We are going to run Edward. Run as fast as you can. _

I pulled Bella into my chest, and bolted towards the speeding black car ahead. Alice slowed remotely, allowing Carlisle and I to enter through the open door. Carlisle shifted to the driver's seat as Alice climbed into the back with Bella and me.

Alice whipped towards the back window and searched the horizon for the threesome; she began to whimper in fear. "Alice, you must calm down, Jasper will be fine. They destroyed her mate and they will dispose of her as well." Carlisle's paternal words blended into the wind as Alice's voice grew loud and harsh.

"Jasper!" She yelped helplessly, all I could do was stare on in horror. I had never seen Alice this hysterical before…she had always been confident in Jasper's abilities, Emmett's strength. Then the truth began to dawn on me and I cringed as Alice's voice climbed to a roar. "No! You don't understand! Rosalie is close to death right now because of her!! She is nothing like James! She can…can…do things!"

That last sentence made the emotions that had been circulating through my body freeze. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end and a jolt of terror rolled through my spine. Alice had kept something from me as well.

Carlisle spun warily around in his seat so that he could look at Alice. "Alice, what kinds of things?"

"She can, I don't know exactly, it's like her hands get really hot." She furrowed her brow and scrunched her eyes closed, focusing on what she had seen.

An unnerving vision played through her head. Esme attentively patrolled the grounds surrounding Charlie's house, she was beginning to get worried…she hadn't heard from Rose in a couple of hours. But of course she couldn't leave her post so she just waited.

Rosalie and Victoria circled each other around a small clearing in the forest. The damp vines and greenery draped around the trees contrasted vividly with the heat of the confrontation beneath them.

They were hissing words through their malignant jaws but none of those could be heard. The debris of the forest that was caught in Rosalie's hair made her appear nearly as wild as the demon in front of her. She suddenly fell to a crouch and bore her formidable teeth.

All that was seen next was a flurry of hair and teeth. Their manes of fire and honey swirled with one another as their claws ripped at the other's body. Abruptly, Victoria's back was pressed to the wall of a tall cliff. Rosalie's hand was forcing Victoria's neck through the sandstone and Victoria's hands rested upon Rose's arms. For some reason, their words suddenly became audible.

"Ah, looky here…the little priss has got me against a wall…" An eerily confident smile snuck towards Victoria's lips, "Whatever will I do?"

Rosalie's fierce snarl made Victoria flinch. But then her smile only grew wider.

"Feisty? Are we?" Victoria's eyes lit with a fire that burned from within. Rosalie's face crumpled in horror and a screech of alarm erupted from her mouth.

"STOP! STOP!" Rosalie's cries made Victoria's wicked expression grow.

"I think you underestimated me, my dear." Victoria had released Rose as she swiftly retreated into the forest. Victoria pursued her prey with excitement. As I watched Victoria approach Rosalie, my heart fell to my feet. Rosalie had two black, ashy marks charred into the skin of her arms, both in the shape of Victoria's merciless hands. I forced the vision from my mind as Victoria charged the cowering figure.

I cradled the fragile human in my arms as I lifted my legs onto the seat, resting my shins against the back of the passenger seat. I placed Bella in my lap, into the lap of her stronghold, and lifted her face towards mine. She still appeared to be asleep. Her safety had been entrusted to my hands and I embraced it with unquestionable surety and enthusiasm, I would be there for her_…forever._ I sought comfort from the horrible vision within her deep rhythmic breaths, and the delicious scent of her exhalations.

Carlisle sped towards the first exit heading southwest.

"I can't believe I didn't see her coming…" Alice spoke her thoughts aloud. "I could have done something…I should have known…I should have been paying closer attention." Her voice cracked in agony. It was just like Alice to blame herself for everything. I moved my hand to her thin shoulder in a gesture of comfort. She buried her face into her hands and sobbed.

I noticed a feathery movement beneath my nose and peered down towards my love. A warm tingly sensation oozed from my heart and dripped into my abdomen. That face could break the heart of even the cruelest creatures.

Bella's eyes began to flutter some. My expression rose to a smile. "Bella?" I whispered softly, "Bella? Are you awake?" Her unfocused eyes opened somewhat. "Carlisle! Carlisle I think she's waking up!" My voice was much louder than necessary but it was no use attempting to mask my joy. He twisted backwards to glance at us.

"Edward?" Her pleasant voice reached my ears and I let it soak into my mind.

"I haven't heard your voice in much too long." I complained with a loving smile still secured to my mouth. She was so tired still. I could see the medicinal drowsiness all over her face.

"We've missed you Bella." Alice's voice quivered some. She was still upset over Jasper. Bella smiled in response, but it was a sleepy smile, one that slipped and slid around until it quickly fell. I almost reached out to catch it before it hit the ground, but I was too focused on the way her lips were moving.

A metallic ring filled the car before the phone was against Carlisle's ear. I could hear Emmett's gruff voice on the other side.

"She's gone." Emmett voice was riddled with anxiety.

"As in dead?" The car swerved casually around an unorthodox twist in the road.

"No. She ran. We have no idea where she is. I have never seen anyone run that fast. Ever." A wave of panic flooded my chest, my stomach bent into an uncomfortable knot.

"Did she run in our direction?" Carlisle's knuckles had a debilitating grip on the steering wheel. No, no she can't follow us. What if she gets to Bella? No. Even the thought threw a web of sorrow over my heart. I would never let that happen. I was Bella's safe house. I would die before I left her side.

"Not at first, but Jasper thought he smelled her heading that way after we lost track of her." I nearly crushed Alice as I slid in the back seat because the car was flung onto a small dirt road to our right. A small wooden sign announced "Sonoran Desert National Monument."

My ears combed the air flying by the car for any evidence of her presence. But my eyes focused on Bella's face, she had fallen back asleep. _Sleep, Bella. Sleep through this horrible nightmare. Sleep until I can assure that you will awake safe and sound_. I begged her with my mind. I tucked a tuft of hair behind her left ear.

"Emmett, meet us soon; we're in the Sonoran national park. Call us once you get close." Carlisle's smooth voice was plagued with intense worry.

Alice pressed her fingers into her temples and wrinkled her nose in concentration, "Why can't I see anything?" Her mind was clouded with frustration and fear, and completely empty of any windows into the future.

As the vehicle raced through the hills of endless sand and bare vegetation, I realized that my hands were holding tightly to Bella's hips. My grip on Bella's sides let loose slightly and I let her settle into the curves of my arms. I didn't want to cause her any discomfort.

I stared adoringly at the flawless angel that slept in my arms; my mind and heart heavy with worry and fear. The sands of the sandman swirled and sifted quietly through Bella's conscious as the night's darkness settled in as a passenger among us.

_Lord, keep us safe from the devilish treachery that endangers the ones we love tonight. Hold us closely in your righteous hand as evil befalls us. Lend us your strength tonight Lord and place courage in our hearts._

_In your son Jesus' name we pray, Amen._

I whispered Carlisle's prayer as he thought it, and we both willed it towards the heavens above us.

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_Author's note- let me know any fixings that need to be made :) i hope you liked it...let me know_


	7. Chapter 7: Scene in the Sonoran

_Author's note- sorry it took so long...finals week...ugh! its intense so prepare_

_i really like it so let me know if u do_

_disclaimer- As always i only own the telling of this story _

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It felt as if my icy heart could beat again as it quivered beneath my ribs. Panic plucked the rigid strings of my heart, this disturbing melody played through my veins.

It was pitch black outside. A bleary layer of clouds snubbed the light of the moon and stars so none of it reached the land. Carlisle drove with the headlights off. I stared at the small creature in my arms through the soggy light; my eyes drew in as much of her as possible.

Alice curled up into a tiny ball to my left. She regained control of her breathing and stifled her silent sobs.  
_Edward, why can't I see anything?_ Her thoughts were heavy with worry.

"I don't know Alice." I really had no idea. I had been concentrating on her thoughts just as strongly as she had. It seemed like the future had for once decided to shut its doors to Alice.

The cell phone had not yet sounded before Carlisle had it at his ear.  
"How far in are you?" Carlisle's words slid through his clenched teeth.  
"Jasper can sense Alice's panic… so I'm guessing a couple of miles?" Emmett's voice had no trace of his usual cheeriness.

"All right well-" I had been focusing on Carlisle and Emmett's conversation before the voice I had been searching for but that I wished more than anything that I wouldn't hear filled my thoughts, a hissing growl began to form in my throat.

_Are those the brothers? They caught up quicker than I thought they would. Stupid family. That wretched boy is going to pity the human once I'm done with her. _

I threw my eyes all over the outside searching for Victoria. The bitter noise in my throat began to lurch up through my lips.

"Edward! Edward what's wrong? What was it?" Alice paused minimally, realized what I was looking for, and then her expression grew wide with horror. "Edward where is she?"  
"I don't know! I can't tell! I can't see her!" I screamed. My heart stung with dread. I saw Bella's hand twitch. _No, Bella. Not now. Stay asleep. Dream Bella. Dream yourself away from here._ I didn't know what to do. How could I protect Bella if I couldn't even find the bitch that threatened her safety?

"Edward," Carlisle purposely smoothed over his voice, but I still detected the worry. "Emmett and Jasper are circling the car. They'll probably see her before we do." I noticed that we had run a straighter course so that my brothers could run along with us. Carlisle's words and the protection of Jasper and Emmett's perimeter didn't calm me at all.

Alice reached into her subconscious and searched for any little bits of the future that lie there. It was empty. Obviously some important decisions had not been made yet.  
Those minutes were infected with sporadic glimpses of Victoria's thoughts. She envisioned ways to hurt Bella. My Bella. The anger that pulsed underneath my bones was making me impatient.

Bella's heartbeat was steadily increasing and I could sense the wonderful return of her scent, she was wholly Bella again. The edges of my lips tilted upwards a little. I lifted her head and interlocked my hands behind it. I let my thumbs skim the outlines of her ears as I stared at her face. At her closed eyes, her soft eyelashes, and the slight opening in her lips where she released captivating sighs. I could stare at that face forever and never get tired of it.  
Forever? Could Bella be with me forever? That was more than I could wish for…  
The click of cell phone keys being punched distracted me from my train of thought. Carlisle contacted Emmett on the cell phone and told them to move in closer.

I heard Emmett murmur to Jasper as they began to close their circle.  
Victoria's cat like thoughts crawled into my ears.

_Shit. Shit. Shit. Not yet._

Not yet? Not yet what? Where the hell was she?  
Alice's shriek and Emmett's roar occurred in the same second. The words collided and flung each other in odd directions. Had I not been listening closely I wouldn't have understood. But fortunately …or unfortunately I did understand. I heard their thoughts before they had. _She's under the car. _

Alice's door ripped open and a stony hand clung to the floorboards. The fiery girl thrust herself into the seat and flung Alice out into the dunes. I heard the clash of boulders as Alice crashed into Jasper's arms.  
I shoved out into the sand as soon as my body would allow it. I held Bella into my chest and ran towards a large ravine in the land, the shallow valley that the Gila River flowed through. A thing that felt like a board of knives hit my back and drove me into the sand. Bella fell from my arms and tumbled through the sand. I could have died right there. My fierce roar bit through the tender air. "NO!"

The ground beneath my chest trembled as Emmett sprinted past me and scooped Bella up from the sand; billowy clouds of dust shadowed his trail of retreat. Victoria's sharp nails began to dig into the frozen flesh above my shoulder blades before a high screech came from her. The loud clap of vampire stone against vampire stone rang in my ears.  
Alice had catapulted herself towards Victoria and forced her off of me. Jasper had joined the brawl to my right. I glanced quickly ahead and saw that Carlisle had run to catch up with Emmett. I was turning my head back towards Alice before a searing flame spread across my neck.

The pain was so intense I could not see; the heat against my skin blurred my vision. I tore at the cold arms attempting to crush my throat. The heat felt like it was penetrating through my skin and smoking into my midsection. A wretched howl erupted from my jaw.  
And then suddenly, it was gone. My legs crumpled weakly and I fell to my knees. I attempted to close my cool hands around my neck but as I did pain shot up through my face and up to the crown of my head. My hands fell to the ground and I balanced on all fours in the shifty sand.

Vicious cries of terror sounded to my left but I was on the ground, gasping for air. Even the steamy Arizona air felt freezing in my windpipe. I felt artificially supplied waves of calm trying to settle over me. I resisted their tranquil caresses, my adrenaline kept my senses heightened. But increased numbers of waves poured over me. "Stop Jasper!" I yelled.

My gaze fell on Jasper and the breath I had finally inhaled escaped from my lungs. Alice had blistering, black strangle marks over her collarbone. The marks looked like a tattooed neck decoration from Hell. Jasper was holding her up with his arms underneath her ribcage. His shoulders were shaking.

"They aren't for you Edward." His voice wavered.  
Alarm consumed me as I realized what was missing... "Where's Victoria!" Dread washed over my body; I already knew the answer.

"She went after the others." He replied. His words were broken as he tried to calm himself.

"Why didn't you follow her!" I cried.

"Edward, she attacked Alice! She got you too!" He seemed angry but his eyes were upset. " I wasn't just going to run away from here and leave Alice here to suffer!" I understood. I would have done the same for Bella.

**Bella.** Oh my god. Bella…She was following Bella! And I wasn't there to protect her! She was fragile and…I needed her.My feet moved faster than my mind. I flew through the dessert air concentrating on catching up to the beast that was after the one thing on this earth that mattered to me.

The fast air stung the wounds on my neck. I snatched a large jackrabbit from beneath me and emptied it of blood. It was unappealing and held a pathetic amount of food. The blood immediately began circulating through my typically empty veins; and it shyly began to dull the pain that pulsed through my upper body.

I have never run that fast in my life. A loud whistle filled my ears as the wind whipped past them. I had to get there. I had to get to _her. _I had to. The lump of fear in my throat was making it hard to breathe.

Every intake of breath seemed to stretch the skin of my neck. And with each stretch came a stab of pain. I winced each time, trying to hold my breath for as long as I could. But I kept trying to catch the scent of Bella on the wind. Just one little trace that would let me know that she was close. Close enough to reach…_hopefully. _

If only I could run faster! I pushed the balls of my feet into the sand and begged my legs to keep going. _Forever._ That's what kept me going. It was necessary that I save Bella. She had to be with me. I needed her. I loved her. I loved her more than anything else; I loved her more than anything I would ever love, that I could ever love.  
She was my soul.  
But did she want to be with me forever? Was she willing to let me drink_ her_ soul from her? Mine was already sewn into Bella with the thread of eternal love. It was a bond that no amount of distance or time could ever break. No other creature would ever have my soul the way Bella did…

My mind suddenly went b-l-a-n-k. And not only was it blank, it was dark. A thick darkness that disoriented me, until I realized what it was. It was Alice, or one of her powerful visions at least. I stopped running and focused on what was playing through my (rather Alice's) head.  
A short flicker of the future snatched my breath away. A sharp bolt of defeat rocked my chest. Victoria had reached them…or would…before I could catch up…

_Her blistering hands stole Bella away from Emmett and strained her into the ground. Bella's back arched in pain as she screamed. Victoria charged towards her again and sliced Bella's arm open with her nails. _  
_Before Victoria could lunge again Carlisle was at her throat and drove her into the ground some ten yards awa_y._ Bella's creamy blood was mixing with the grainy sands as I saw her eyes flutter shut in disgust. The smell of her own blood sickened her into unconsciousness._

My eyes opened to the infinite dessert that I had closed them to. My chest heaved forward in a choke of would be tears and I began to run. I hadn't gotten far before I heard a blood-curdling scream that crumpled my heart and threw it into my feet.

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_Author's note- intense right? haha let me know what u thought_


	8. Chapter 8: The End?

_Author's note- This one was hard to write...let me know anything you think needs to be changed or things you like or whatever_

_Enjoy. R&R_

_Disclaimer- I don't own anything of Twilight or New Moon._

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**BPOV **

The surprisingly hot hands that forced me out of Emmett's arms made me gasp.

I hadn't finished my breath before I was slammed into what felt like a bendable piece of concrete.

I felt something sharp shove through the skin of my back, my head rebounded from the impact and my chin ricocheted off of my chest. I was choking on the air in my throat, searching for any bit of oxygen to soothe my burning lungs. My ribs felt like they had collapsed.

I couldn't help but wonder where Edward was. Did he leave me here? Did he finally realize how imperfect I really was? A shudder ran down my body.

Suddenly my eyes began to blur and my thoughts swam through a disgusted fog. My arm was hot…and bleeding, bad. The smell of salty iron and rust made me feel sick. I cringed internally as I glanced down at the crimson streaks running into the ground. I could feel blood underneath me from my back and head too.

Maybe this would be the end. Perhaps fate had finally caught up with me. Because James hadn't finished the job (thanks to Edward) Victoria would.

It tore me up inside as I thought of Edward's absence. But I should be thankful that he loved me at all. I would spend my last moments enjoying the moments he gave me, and the love he filled my heart with instead of wrestling with reality.

I smiled as the smell of Edward's skin and the sound of his velvety voice sang through my mind.

"BELLA!"

This voice was the one I expected to hear in my final moments…but not this way…it wrought with pain. I wondered why. Maybe I could help? Why was I hearing these words? Why couldn't I remember how he said he loved me…

I just let my thoughts slip away into the warm wind. Maybe when I got to heaven my angel would be there. Maybe.

**EPOV**

A heave in my chest throttled me face down into the sand.

The sloppy air fell hard into the deep parts of my lungs. I gulped the air but it still felt like I was being suffocated. My hands shook and my neck stung as small pieces of sand shifted into it.

What was I doing? Bella was in trouble. And I was here! I was here crying in the sand. I was useless. What more could I do to put her in danger? I hated myself. I cursed the heavens for having brought me into Bella Swan's life. I was an executioner to the only person that could make my dead heart beat. She hung from a noose of bloodthirsty monsters waiting to suck her dry.

A wicked knot in my heart tightened cripplingly. A sickly hate for myself began to drain from it. My hand flew to my chest and kept the bleeding organ between my ribs from falling into the sand.

I raised myself out of the sand and bolted towards the hideous scream that had shattered my insides. I yelled into the unsettled night air. I just screamed her name. I wasn't sure if she could hear me…but maybe she would hold on longer if she did. _Please Bella. Oh please don't leave me now. I can't live without you. I won't live without you._ I made myself a promise. If Bella died I would die. I would follow her into the afterlife. If God felt merciful perhaps he would let me be with my angel.

So I ran as if I had wings.

A scent filled my nostrils that made my throat ache with thirst and my stomach twist sickeningly in the same moment. Was she hurt worse than I had seen?

The sand flew in front of me as I stopped dead in my tracks. I could see them. They were still relatively far away but my enhanced vision had its advantages. Carlisle was charging at Victoria as she tried to lunge at Bella again. Emmett leaned over Bella and was trying to wake her up.

In less than a few seconds I was there.

"FILTHY BASTARD! YOU'LL PAY FOR WHAT YOU DID TO JAMES! YOU'LL PAY IF IT'S THE LAST THING I EVER DO! THAT LITTLE GIRL IS GOING TO DIE AND YOU'RE GOING TO WATCH! I CAN'T…."

Victoria's vehement screeches were interrupted as I plowed into her chest forcing her over the cliff. We fell for less than a second before I threw my claws into Victoria's stony skin.

I could feel Carlisle's thoughts as he stood next to Bella and Emmett but I pushed them away. I had to focus.

We struggled intensely for a few moments but I didn't feel her blistering grip on my arms and torso or the bite of her sharp nails. I fought for Bella. The love I had for her fueled me past any strength or power Victoria could ever have.

Finally I shoved Victoria's neck against a boulder at the edge of the river. She smiled menacingly at me and then spat in my face.

"No one will ever remember you dear. You can't honestly believe that that pathetic human cares for you the way you seem to care about her. How could she? You're a beast. You're the type of monster she had nightmares of when she was little. Don't you see?"

Victoria's words filled me with an unquestionable angst but I heard the faint ring of truth within the statement. My ribs softened and my heart came to weigh a thousand pounds. I could barely hold up my chest.

I growled fiercely and then snapped the neck between my hands, threw the skull against the opposite cliff wall, and roared in fury. Its pieces flew into the floor of the ravine only to be swallowed up by the sand. I tore the other body parts into pieces and threw them into the river.

**Emmett's POV**

God what had I done. Oh no. What would Edward think? Would he ever forgive me? Carlisle said it was the only way. But he had to go find Alice and Jasper. Oh no…I dreaded seeing Edward's face when he found out. Shit. This was going to be bad.

And what about poor Bella? I couldn't lose the only little sister I had ever known! I just couldn't. Was that selfish of me?

I heard the sound of splintering stone. I ran to the edge of the cliff and saw him tearing up what was left of the stupid bitch. I wished I could have been the one to do that. She deserved the deepest circle of Hell. And then I saw Edward turn and meet my gaze. I couldn't help my mind.

**EPOV**

_I'm so sorry._

Emmett's thoughts froze in my mind. I felt like my limbs were going to scamper away from me as I shook furiously. What the fuck was he sorry about?

Did Bella die? Was she gone? I quickly dismissed those thoughts…I couldn't even bear the idea.

"What the fuck happened Emmett!" My voice trembled.

I saw his mind run through the past five minutes.

Carlisle dashed to Bella's side where Emmett was holding her hand.

"Carlisle! Carlisle what's wrong? Is she going to be okay?! What do we do?"

"No Emmett. She's not okay…these wounds are fatal."

"Fatal? Like deadly? NO! No, they can't be. She suffered the same or worse because of James."

"Exactly, she has not healed completely from the wounds James gave her. Actually she's barely healed at all. The impact between her and the ground not only forced her severed shoulder blade through the skin on her back, it caused severe head trauma. Plus she's suffering from intense internal bleeding because all of the internal wounds James inflicted were held together by a weak stitching. And all of those lacerations were ripped open by the strength of the fall."

"So she's dead? There's no way to save her? She'll die in this hellish sand pit?" Emmett's voice was hysterical with panic.

"There's only one way to save her now, and that's to change her."

"So do it!" Emmett's command caused Carlisle to turn a fatherly gaze upon him.

"Emmett I'm not sure if that's the best thing to do. One Edward might kill us, and two maybe this was God's plan. Maybe we aren't supposed to interfere with deaths that seem so fated."

"Carlisle that is the most hypocritical statement ever! You changed Edward when you knew he was going to die from that fever! You saved Esme when she jumped off of that cliff! You changed me because of the bear! You can't just leave her here to die! You can't."

"All right Emmett. Well I have to go find Jasper and Alice. I'll bring them here and we can all discuss the best decision."

"But…but what if it's too late?" Carlisle rose and dashed away to find my brother and sister.

Emmett stared into Bella's face; his expression and thoughts twisted with indecision and worry. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to do it without killing her. He hadn't had human blood in so long. Just the thought brought a fresh pool of venom into his mouth.

He gently grabbed her sides and flipped her over. What the hell was he doing?

He gently ripped Bella's shirt down past where Carlisle had pushed her shoulder blade back into her body. The deep longitudinal hole was bleeding profusely and grains of sand were stuck to the edges, the way salt hugs the rim of a margarita. The sand was for texture and Bella's blood was the tempting beverage. He lowered his face until he was directly above the wound and I could feel him fighting off the thirst.

He let his mouth open and waited. What was he doing? And then I saw a sudden stream of venom fall from his mouth into her wound. He was just going to let gravity pull the venom into her? I kept with the thought until I saw that his mouth had gone dry and all of the venom that had previously been there was circulating through Bella.

I felt the breath leave my chest and the night sky began to spin. Bella was going to be changed? Now?!

I felt the electricity of the moment as I climbed the cliff wall and crawled to her side. I couldn't identify the emotion that was wrangling in my chest…anger? Excitement? Relief? Fury? I didn't care. All I cared about was Bella, about getting to her side as quick as possible.

I tenderly grabbed her shoulder and flipped her back over as I heard Carlisle, Jasper and Alice approaching. Alice already knew. I lifted Bella into my lap as softly as I could.

I leaned down to touch her lips to mine as her face scrunched together and she cried out in pain. My heart sliced in two and disintegrated into ashes. Its remains skittered out of my mouth and became added grains of sand.

All I could do was cry. I cried for Bella's pain, for her human life that ended here, and I cried in responsibility for her torture. This was my entire fault.

The star of my twilight was dying. But because of Emmett…she wouldn't leave…she'd be here forever. But would she ever forgive me for all that I had caused? I had done nothing but curse the angel in my lap. I certainly hadn't done anything to deserve her and the past week was just testimony to why I did not.

Would Bella's light go out? Sure the flame that lit her blood would be extinguished…

But the fire that burned in her soul wouldn't… the fire that burned there was like the pilot light to my heart. It was the continuous beam that led me through my darkest hours.

I could only await the answers as the night began to slide way and the stars fell asleep behind the clouds.

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_Author's note- leave your thoughts...they're important to me :)_


	9. Chapter 9: The Inferno

_Author's note: Bella's change was hard to describe…let me know if I did a satisfactory job _

_R&R…thanks to my reviewers you guys keep me going!!_

_Disclaimer: I only own the telling of this story. _

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My hands trembled as I nestled Bella's body closer into mine. Her skin scorched, filled with the fire of the venom. She had been worryingly silent. Every once in a while she would shudder and I would adjust her even closer into me.

How could I have let this happen? What kind of monster was I? To put her through this…

But would I have been able to watch her die? Would I have been able to witness her soul departing forever? The thought punched a hole through me that made me forcibly exhale. No. I could never have let her leave…let alone watch…

**BPOV**

I remembered once when I was little that Renee took me to one of her friend's houses. She had a pool in the backyard. I was eager to get in because I had never really felt the coolness of pool water all around me before…so I began to pull on my mother's dress to get me a bathing suit so that I could go swimming.

She got me one and was pulling swimmies onto my arms when one just wouldn't fit. She went back inside to find another…but I couldn't wait to get into the pool, I was sitting down to dip my feet in when I slipped.

My heart beat heavily in my chest and I held my breath as tightly as I could as the water closed over my head. My arms floundered as I tried to pull the water above me beneath my legs. I cried out underwater as my chest gasped in a lung full of water. I thrust my arms towards the surface and tried with all my might to climb out of the consuming body.

The water was much colder than it had seemed.

And soon enough the struggle tired my muscles to a point of replete exhaustion. I let my arms fall to my sides and floated in the freezing fluidity around me. Small air bubbles tickled the tip of my nose as they escaped to the surface. Suddenly a tense arm wrapped around my middle and towed me to the surface.

This was all I could think of to compare the blaze that surrounded me now. The torch ignited everything it touched. I held my breath for as long as possible for every time I inhaled, my lungs drown in fire.

The heat came from inside. I had felt this before…this torturous lick of flame against the walls of my veins. But when? Why couldn't I remember? Wouldn't I remember a pain like this?

My shoulder blades pinched together as a scream crawled through my teeth. But like an underwater scream…it was silent. The flames had scorched my throat raw. I wouldn't have been able to make a sound even if I had wanted to.

I felt the fever tingling over my face. I reached my arms up to stop the burn, to block the overwhelming heat. But it did nothing…like only one swimmy…I was drowning in this pool of sweltering consumption.

What was happening to me? What was this? Maybe I had ended up in Hell after all.

And then an angelic whisper blew against the side of my head. It felt cool in the cave of my ear. The sound vibrated soothingly through my mind.

"_Bella?"_

"Mmm." A hum was all that escaped in response.

"_Are you alright?"_ The voice seemed fuzzy, like it had to travel through a dense fog to reach me…or smoke…thick smoke.The poor thing sounded so scared. I was hot. But I liked when it talked to me. I opened my mouth to tell it to keep talking but again…silence.

A vicious jab of fire made me throw my arms out onto whatever was beneath me and desperately clasp my hands around it.

"_Carlisle, fix this! Help her!"_

Help? Yes. Help please. Dive in. Grab me. Help me. Save me. Or let me drown. I can't breathe. I can't reach the surface. Why wasn't I gone by now?

"_Edward, there's nothing I can do. Just let the venom run its course_." A hurt sigh fell from the wonderful thing next to me.

**EPOV**

I had never hated myself as much as when Bella's face contorted in sheer pain.

The first day had passed with a lot of physical movement. She would thrash around like she was drowning…and then grow too exhausted to continue.

We had driven into Flagstaff and gotten four rooms at a hotel. We wanted to put the nearest neighbors as far from us as possible in case Bella screamed or made any other disconcerting noise.

I couldn't bear the fact that I had caused this. Not only had I caused this unbearable pain, I couldn't stop it. She lay in front of me ripping through the air above her…trying to escape the inferno inside of her. But I could do nothing…just observe.

Every yank of her muscles and every slow of her heartbeat stung me as much as it did her. I felt her pain because my soul was woven into her sinew. Every subtraction of warmth from Bella's skin beat on my soul. I could read the pain as it tweaked across her flawless features. That pain was so brutal…all I wanted to do was take it from her completely.

The venom seemed to spread quickly and then drag the temperature within her from hot to scalding in a matter of milliseconds. I remembered that pain, the pain that could only be described as the fires of Satan himself.

I felt helpless. I was helpless to ease the horrid pain plaguing my angel. Bella was suffering at the hands of the fallen angel and all I could do was lay here and watch.

There was a bitter bite deep within my frozen heart that shoved the breath I had been encasing into the air. But it came more as a yell.

"Edward?" Jasper's calm voice punctured the tension that was looming above me.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry to intrude, but I felt something weird coming from her and I thought you might be able to help her."

Help? Help her?

"What is it Jasper?"

"I'm not sure exactly what it is, but it's like she's searching for something, she calmed for a moment before you yelled to Carlisle…and then she became just as tense as before. Did you say something to her? Or hold her or something?"

Yeah, I had said something…and she responded? I lay down onto my elbow and leaned my lips close to Bella's ear.

"Bella? Can you hear me?" She minimally relaxed the tight grip she had on the bed sheets.

"Yep, that was it." Jasper smiled slightly and disappeared silently back into the other room.

"I love you Bella Swan." I allowed the tips of my fingers to graze the skin of her cheeks. Her skin was noticeably cooler.

"I'm here Bella. I'll be here, right here, next to you, forever."

My eyes blurred a little and as I blinked a vision, unlike any I had ever seen Alice have, crowded my mind. But I just assumed it was Alice again, it had to be.

Bella (a vampire Bella) ran ahead of me back in the woods of Forks. She turned back to me and a brilliant smile filled her mouth. My heart fluttered and I chased after her…desperate to catch her and hold her…to kiss those lips.

I opened my eyes as I heard the door open. It was Alice.

I smiled at her. "I liked that one."

"That one what Edward?"

"That vision, I liked it."

"Edward I haven't had _any_ visions." I stared at her quizzically.

"Edward, I haven't had a vision since I saw Emmett change Bella." Speaking of Emmett I hadn't heard anything from him since we got here. Which I had to admit was a slight relief since his constant psychological apologies had gotten bothersome in the car.

"Where is Emmett?"

"He left to take a walk a while ago. He feels terrible." I nodded slowly.

But if Alice hadn't had any visions…then what whose vision had that been? I certainly couldn't read Bella's mind…and I didn't know of any other clairvoyant vampires nearby.

I glanced down at Bella. Her expression seemed a little more tranquil. Alice crept out of the room.

I leaned closer into Bella's face and pecked her swollen lips.

Whose thought had that vision been? Was it mine? I had never been much of a daydreamer…

Bella was the only deep dreamer I had ever known…

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_Author's note: let me know what you think!_


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